But how often do we actually hear the nitty-gritty details of how we might actually achieve those things? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a licensed sex psychotherapist based in San Francisco, to help us out with the specifics. A: Thanks so much for your question. Here's what you need to know. So many of my female clients complain about sex that is boring, unpleasurable, painful, routine, and just plain bad.
When Sex Is Painful
When does Sex stop hurting?
Q: Sex just hurts for me, even when I go overboard on lubricant. On top of that, I also feel extremely sore and itchy down there. Help, what can I do? First things first. Speak up, even if you feel nervous or embarrassed. Once you get the green light that everything is clear, this is what I want you to focus on: restarting your sexual journey and redefining what it means to experience comfort and pleasure — for yourself.
What To Do When Sex Hurts
When should I see a health care professional about painful sex? What kinds of gynecologic conditions can cause pain during sex? Are there things a woman can do on her own to help with pain during sex? Pain during intercourse is very common—nearly 3 out of 4 women have pain during intercourse at some time during their lives. For some women, the pain is only a temporary problem; for others, it is a long-term problem.
In an ideal world, sex would always be about intimacy, pleasure, fun and exploration—not pain or stress. Pain during sex is actually fairly common for people with vaginas. Many people feel uncomfortable talking about their pain, and end up gritting their way through it.